Why do men name their penises? Because they don't like the idea of having a stranger make 90 percent of their decisions.
Why are all dumb blonde jokes one liners? So men can understand them.
What's the smartest thing a man can say? - "My wife says..."
Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet? Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good looking? They all already have boyfriends.
How do you get a man to stop biting his nails? Make him wear shoes.
Why don't women blink during sex? There isn't enough time.
What do you call a man with an opinion? Wrong.
What do a pregnant woman, a burnt pizza and frozen beer have in common? A man who didn't take it out in time.